Newness for a New Year

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Being Set Up and Hitting the Town

Being 27 and single, I am often approached by friends and even by friends of friends about being set up. Although I like to joke about it, I am appreciative of all my friends who "just want me to be as happy as they are." However, it seems that my happiness is often confused with the status of my dating life. It reminds me of a situation I heard about a month or so ago: a well-meaning woman asked the mother of my friend if she were dating anyone. "No, but she is happy with where she is." "Well, she can't really be happy, not if she isn't married. I mean, deep down she isn't really happy." While I agree that there is an added and eternal measure of happiness that comes through marriage; I don't believe that marriage is a window to happiness. If you can't find happiness in who you are as a single, then it will be awfully hard to find it just by getting married.

Enough of my dating theory, the point of this post is to report on what I enjoy about getting set up. It isn't the dating part so much as it is listening to what my friends say when they tell me about some guy. The number one characteristic that is offered as to why I should want to date Mr. So and So is that he is smart. I am not sure why this is always the first thing, but I have discovered through my many years of blind dates that being smart doesn't mean you can actually carry on a conversation. I also love seeing what people must think of me by the type of guy they set me up with. It is always such a surprise. Now, I must say that I do believe that set ups can work. I am grateful for friends and friends of friends who have introduced me to some of the most worthwhile people and experiences of my life. But, you can't take blind dating all that seriously and what fun would it be to be single and 27 if I couldn't laugh at myself and the whole process of dating.

Here are some of the recent offers.

1. A doctor (I think that is what she said) but he lives across the United States. She believes in long-distance relationships though. ... I've struggled to make it work with people living in my own city.

2. A guy in a band. He tends to be active and then not-so-active in the Church, but he is a riot. ... I don't even know what to say to that one.

3. A lawyer. He lives his life in black and white, although he has seen enough of the world to understand that there is some grey (or something like that). ... I've never gone out with a lawyer (only want-to-be lawyers) , but what is that greyness all about?

4. A brother of friend. His last girlfriend had been Miss Utah. ... Wow! What kind of pressure does that put on a girl?

Aside from the woes of dating, I am grateful for those evenings when you hit the town (and yes, I do mean downtown Provo) for an enjoyable and relaxing evening. Last Friday, I spent the evening with some girlfriends. We went to all our favorite stores in Downtown and discovered some new favorites. Downtown Provo actually has quite a bit of life, and there will be more in the future since Provo is working on a new master plan for the Downtown area. There is a lot to offer, and I love the architecture of many of the old buildings Downtown, which you can see in this photo.

There is a new vintage store on University called Coal Umbrella. It had a very eclectic assortment of local art, belt buckles, and vintage clothing. It has a nice spread, and it is a cool store. I enjoyed looked at the local art of up-and-coming artists much more than the clothing selection though. It was like walking into my grandma's closet. I couldn't bring myself to buy something that I could snatch for free the next time I visit her. (Not that I don't like a few items from my nana's closet, but there was not much variety in terms of clothing.) But, we ate at the Smokehouse BBQ place on University. They are known for their mashed potatoes, which were extraordinarily delicious. I also tried some pizza, which was also quite tasty and very affordable.

We then went around the corner onto Center and discovered a new gelato shop called Maestro's Gelato Cafe. It has a clean and simple design with cobblestones inside to give you the European feel. The crepes are bit overpriced at $6.50 for a nutella and banana crepe(my favorite). But, the gelato is scrumptious. We sat by the window and watched all the people walk by, and there were actually quite a lot of people patronizing Downtown Provo. So, if you find yourself in Provo in the near future, head over to Center Street and indulge in some wonderful gelato. Among the three of us we tried mint and chocolate, pink grapefruit and creme, and coconut. All of them were delicious, so you can't go wrong.


Dan Simpson said...

I would take one of your points one step further. If you cannot be happy single, you will not be happy married.

Happiness comes from inside (though you can gain greater joy from things around you, I wouldn't pretend that marriage and kids haven't brought me oodles of joy).

If one is unhappy, marriage won't fix that, it will in all liklihood exacerbate the problems.

Tammy said...

I like the profiles of the guy offerings. Having never been set up on a blind date I have never had the fun of seeing who my friends would set me up with--that must be pretty interesting! One of my good friends with a quirky sense of humor used to say he would pay me to greet a blind date wearing a fanny pack--unfortunately I never got the chance to try that one out. shucks.

Rachel Mae said...

I've had fun scanning through your blog. I'm glad Rachael told me about it, even though it was under sad cirumstances.

I have to share a hilarious line Kristin (Matthews) was given about a potential set-up by one of our neighbors: he's a magician!